54 more days until my much deserved and very needed vacation (not that I’m counting or anything).  I’m so looking forward to whole ritual of making lists (a habit I developed from my mom), getting everything all together and packed, loading up the car and arriving at Recess.  Heck even the drive is exciting to me – especially the moment you come around the bend on Rt. 158 at Point Harbor and see the Wright Memorial Bridge crossing the Currituck Sound – that’s when I know I’ve truly arrived!

This year should be interesting – we’re gonna have a house full:  Keith and I, Jeff and Maria (friends of ours from NY), Allie (Keith’s daughter) and I think a friend of her’s from college, my niece Amber – yay Plan B. (maybe her boyfriend Johnny – not sure about that one yet) and maybe even Ashley (Keith’s oldest) and her boyfriend.

I’m kinda bummed that Ian and his family won’t be able to make it (I was really looking forward to crabbing with him again) but, it sounds like they’ve got a number of other summer vacation plans so it all works out in the end.

I think I’ve talked mom into using Outer Beaches for next years vacation – this time dad is gonna pay – since it looks like they (Outer Beaches) are going to continue their ‘Vacation Lay-a-Way‘ program.  I have to say, that is one of the best marketing ideas – you just have the total rental broken down into 12 payments which are automatically applied to your bank account or credit card.  The old way of paying for vacation homes was about 50% down within 30 days of booking the house with the remaining 50% due 30 days prior to arrival.  They do not charge interest at all, nor do they charge some of those ridiculous fees that other agencies charge.

I’m looking forward to sharing my OBX passion with Jeff and Maria – I don’t think they’ve ever been to the Outer Banks before.  Hopefully they won’t be bored with a more laid back vacation destination and will enjoy themselves quite a bit.

Family…Food…Friends…Fun – in no particular order at all, these are really things that make life worth living.  This was a GREAT Easter weekend and I had a blast.  Saturday we had an Easter egg hunt with some of the younger members of our family and extended family and Sunday we had Easter dinner with my best friend and his partner.

Saturday morning sort of had me worried – I mean it was supposed to be in the low 80′s and it didn’t get there fast enough – the day actually started out kinda cool and overcast but that changed just in time!  We had Ian and Nicky with Audrey; we had April and Shannon with Aden along with April’s mom and her new beau; and we had Isabella (Isa) and Antonio (Toni) all over for lunch and the hunting of pastel, plastic candy-filled eggs.  Apparently the warning I’d given the twins earlier about letting the little ones get a chance at the eggs must have fallen on deaf little ears.  We had to reign them in a couple of times so that Aden and Audrey could get some too.

The weather was great and we had a simple lunch of hot dogs, chips & hummus and beans – had to have something the dwarfs would eat!  Sadly, Audrey wasn’t feeling well – the poor thing was coughing up a lunch – so Ian and Nicky left a bit early to get the baby to the doctor.  Keith later told me Ian or Nicky had called to let us know that apparently Aud was having an asthma attack – egads but she was feeling a bit better.  After the rest of the folks left, the twins and I hung out until our 4:30 showing of How to Tame Your Dragon (in RealD 3D) – side note – it was a SUPER movie and I swear the 3D effects actually seemed better than those in Avatar.

Sunday we futzed around the house doing some gardening and cleaning of the pond and Keith did some cooking.  Ben and Tim came over after going to the annual Easter event, ‘Monument on Parade‘ and we had a nice dinner.  Keith made cauliflower and blue cheese soup, a delicious green bean/red onion/olive/hard boiled egg salad, leg of lamb roasted with fingerling potatoes and olives and for dessert a yummy Meyer lemon crepe cake that he found in the Easter edition of Martha Stewart Living.  Although I didn’t really eat my lamb (it’s just a me thing – I think the idea of a baby animal coupled with the musky smell/taste is just something I can’t hack) I did wolf down 2 bowls of the soup and ate everything else — yes, yes I put my NutriSystem on hold for the day but, I’ll be back to it tomorrow.  (Hell, I’m just proud I’ve gone from 232 down to 215 in about 2 months – YAY ME!)

Now, I’m winding down my day on the back deck with a glass of Barefoot Moscato (thank you Nicky for turning me on to this – I think I like it even better than my normal Chateau Morrisette ‘Our Dog Blue‘!!) and my laptop (yay home wi-fi) blogging about my fantastic weekend filled with family, friends, food and fun!!

Probably going to see this on Saturday with my niece - whom I promised I would take when it opened but didn’t get to.  I’m all about the 3-D goodness (I loved seeing Avatar in 3-D) so I’m excited!  Not sure how it is going to be with a 7 year old though heh, never took a dwarf to a movie before.  Maybe we’ll see if Toni wants to hang with Isa and I, hey if I can stand 1 seven year old twin, why not have the other…..right?  I’m sure mom and Brandy won’t mind having the little darlings out of their hair for a couple of hours….who knows, maybe we’ll even do lunch before/after the movie!!  The weather is supposed to be beautiful on Saturday!

Need to check out Fandango and see where it is playing and when – Chuck hates, HATES waiting in line for his tickets and will gladly pay the additional convenience fee to make sure that I don’t have to wander through those maze things like some cow in a pen.

Well, we’re not quite that picturesque (we’re MUCH better dressed – though my fondness for plaid is certainly up there with Grandpa Walton’s and there aren’t that many of us) but, there is a certain je ne sais quoi about our arrangement to have our son, daughter-in-law and granddaughter move in with us for a year.  We offered to let the kids move in to A) Be able to pay down some debt and get their credit cleaned up and B) Save some money during the year to hopefully have enough for a down payment on their first house.

We (Keith and I) weren’t really in a position to be able to stroke a check to make all their debt go away and, frankly, I don’t know if we would have done so if we were in a position to do it – sometimes life lessons have to be lived through in order to learn from them.  What we did have is a bit of extra room in the house so we were able to accommodate them moving in, it just took a bit of re-arranging things.

We turned the TV room into their bedroom (we brought the TV downstairs to the living room) and turned the spare bedroom into Audrey’s (the granddaughter) room.  It gave us an excuse to get rid of some of the furniture we were no longer fond of anyway hehehe.  So we’re a bit more ‘snug’ than we were with just the two of us and the dogs/cats but hey, we’re able to help them out and as an added bonus, we get to see the baby more – YAY!

I think the flip side is that everyone is having to make adjustments for the lifestyle they were previously accustomed to.  I guess everything is all about compromise and finding common ground and all that.

Oh what adventures I’m/we’re/you’re in store for oh vastness that is the internet!

I love my mom, I really do.

Recently, after seeing her lug around a CD Walkman (OMG HOW absolutely archaic is THAT) and those big ole padded headphones for far too long, my father broke down and bought my mom a nice Sony MP3 player.  I guess he got tired of seeing her with that sac purse – yes she bought a sack purse to carry around the house with her to hold her CD walkman in while she cleaned the house – God love her.  So, now she has this thing and doesn’t quite know how to work it.  She asks my ‘never without her iPod’ niece to help her with it.  Amber apparently explains that she doesn’t know how to work anything but an iPod, wow so young and already in that Apple Cult I guess, and cannot help her grandmother.

Mom calls me, the son, Jr. – cause well….I’m kinda a big deal …… in Japan.  Nah, I am the only one in the family that really knows much about technology.  Wait…isn’t that my 13 year old nephew Alex in there on his wirelessly connected laptop surfing MySpace?  And…and….isn’t that my 6 year old nephew Antonio rocking that DS game? Hmmmm I guess she just has more confidence in my…cause…well…I’m the shit….. in my mind.

Back on topic.  So mom wants me to come over because she has this mp3 player but cannot get anyone to help her actually get music onto it (makes for a really swank paperweight I reckon) and can I help her.  SURE!  I’ve had an mp3 player, I know how to read instructions that come with electronic merchandise, I’m sure I can figure it out.  After arriving at moms place, I quickly show her just how fast it is to rip her own CDs onto the laptop that I gave her and then sync her mp3 player to her music library.  Color her stunned.  She’s amazed at how fast it is.  Before long we have all of her Travis Tritt, Elvis, and other music I know nothing about on her mp3 player and she’s THRILLED.

No more going around the house with a bag around your neck holding your CD walkman, the 8 foot cord, and other accessories – just stick the little mp3 player in your pocket and away you go.

I love my mom.  It’s so great seeing her get so amazed at things that I sort of take for granted.  Is this a glimpse of what it will be like as she and dad move further into their golden years – me the parent and they the child marveling at the wonders of … well….stuff?

Who knows – I just know it makes me feel needed by my parents and it’s a way of letting me feel like I’m able to help them out, even if it is only something as silly as loading songs onto a music player.  *shrug*

My Heaven on Earth.

I know that sounds quite unappetizing but to me it is/was a WONDERFUL combination.  This time of year I start reminiscing about Easters and Spring Break in the Outer Banks (OBX for those that know) of North Carolina.  When my sisters and I were young, our paternal grandparents would take us to Nags Head for Easter.  I remember thinking at the time it was a HUGE deal because, if I recall correctly, we usually got out of school a day or two early.  I just remember thinking how neat it was that we got to miss school to go to the beach.

We would always stay at Travelers Inn, which was right across the street Jeannettes Pier (which was MUCH more impressive back in the day – before a hurricane took most of it away), and it had a swimming pool so we thought we were just the cat’s ass – hey we were KIDS what did we know.  My grandmother would hide those individually wrapped Brach’s marshmallow eggs out in the sand and shrubs around the hotel and the kids would hunt for them – making sure we didn’t step on or grab those evil little spinney seed pod thingees. *shudder*  I would always, ALWAYS try to wake up extra early to run across the street and see if, over night, the tides had brought any cool treasures to the beach that I could collect.  I was usually rewarded with bits of driftwood, some mermaid purses, broken shells and the like but, I vividly remember finding a conch shell that was only slightly chipped.  I don’t know what happened to that shell but, for the longest time, I had it in my bedroom while I was a boy at my parents house.

I think those initial trips to the Outer Banks were what started us on – well my – life long love of the place.  Some people like Virginia Beach; some like Myrtle Beach; some like the Florida coast – me….I’ll take the OBX over all of that.  I know my mom loves the place as much as I do.  Eh, I even remember our very first beach house that we rented in Salvo it was the Wimbledome.  We actually were repeat renters at this particular house but then as the years went by, we tried different homes.  The last one that we rented was the Idler – Keith and I rented that for mom because she had always wanted to stay at a house “on the beach” not 1 lot back, not ‘Ocean Side’ but, ON the beach.

We usually prefer to go down a bit further than Kitty Hawk, Nags Head, and Killdevil Hills to places like Salvo, Waves, Rodanthe (yes the recent Richard Gere movie is about this place), Avon etc..  No matter which house we stay in there are 2 prerequisites for a week long vacation in the OBX, we HAVE to go to The Blue Whale or Jobobs Trading Post- it’s in the rules…we just have to – and it wouldn’t be a summer vacation in the OBX without to me (or mom).

I need to start planning for one or more 2010 OBX trips.  I want to take more trips with my nieces and nephews and my parents and such but, I also want to take vacations with “My” family – us, our son & daughter-in-law and of course our granddaughter.  I’ve decided that it’s going to be part of Audrey’s life too once she gets a bit older – going to the OBX.  I hope she falls in love with it as much as I did.

In the meantime I’ll just wax sentimental with my childhood memories of sun, sand, and easter eggs.

Sand and Eggs and Sand

Side Note:  I actually started this post on 1/25/09 @ 8:40 AM and just never finished it….who knew….

I had every intention of buying my mother a laptop for her birthday – the kids NEVER let her on the computer at home and I wanted her to be able to connect with her brother (in Canada) and her sisters (one in Arizona), and other family members via email, instant messaging, video chat, etc..  I mean really, picking up the phone and calling people is soooooooo 3 decades ago and writing a letter…..didn’t that stop in the Victorian era? 

Like I said, I ‘had’ the intention until I went out and found a laptop that was reasonable priced, had double the RAM and HD that my current laptop had AND it had an HDMI port which meant I could stream my videos from Anime Fuel, Hulu, Veoh, and others directly to the 42″ flat panel goodness in the TV room.  (Come on – you gotta love watching MASK, Thundercats, Superfriends, Transformers, GI Joe, Silverhawks, etc. – well…I do so neener!)

Needless to say, I ended up buying that one for myself, and restored my Acer back to factory settings and giving it to mom.  I figured she wasn’t gonna be playing City of Heroes or World of Warcraft so I (mememe) needed the more powerful laptop cause…..well…..I would be.

Flash forward to today (4/7/09):

Mom likes her laptop – I set it up with a password so that only she could get onto it.  That didn’t stop the lil’ beggars from trying to worm the PW outta her…nooooo but, kudos to mom she stood strong.  My dad’s desktop died so he had to get a laptop, then my nephew had a fit to get one too so…yes…the freshly turned 13 year old has a laptop of his own too.  Then Amber, my niece wanted a laptop too.  So, now there is high speed internet and wireless router (Thank you Uncle Chucky) in the house with 4 laptops connecting.  Hmmm you know what’s gonna be funny is when Christmas rolls around and yours truly says, “Okay, if you want the high speed internet, someone needs to step up and pay for it, because only the first year was on me.”….and watch their faces.  So spoiled on high speed, they would rather eat dirt than go back to AOL and *gasp* dial-up.

Might I just say, WTF is wrong?!?!  When I was a kid, I was LUCKY to have a cassette tape boombox of my own to listen to Duran Duran, Flock of Seagulls, Adam Ant, Thompson Twins etc on.  There was none of this I have my own cell phone, laptop, iPod, TV, DVD player, PSP, PS2 in my room crap…when did kids develop this whole entitlement thing and when did parents start buying into it?

I’m sooooooooo happy that my mother likes her laptop (I’ve never given my mother a $600 ANYTHING before – but…she’s worth it) it was cute when she showed me her new laptop case.  I was tickled. 

….Now to get her into MMORPGs…..muahahahahaha

Happy Valentine's Day

 OR

Happy Birthday to Keith

Actually, it’s BOTH - that’s right!  Today is Valentine’s Day AND it’s Keith’s 51st birthday!  For his birthday, I got him 3 David Austin ‘Jude the Obscure‘ roses – which REALLY do smell like guava – I have NO idea how that happens but, they really, truly do smell like a lush tropical fruit.  I also got him some new Green Pans which are sooooooooo freaking amazing!

Miss America pose with Birthday Princess crown!

So, this past Sunday was my 40th birthday – I have officially entered ‘trolldom’ well, at least that was how I used to view it.  Now….not so much – I’m actually very happy with my life.  I knew I was having a party (well, if Keith knew what was good for him that is, I was going to have a party) and up until last Saturday, I thought the party was going to be Sunday.  My best friend, Ben, had invited us to his house for dinner Sunday evening and I figured that was the same ruse as I used to get Keith to Ben’s house for his 50th so he must have been using the same thing for my 40th.

So Saturday I bought some new jeans, a new shirt and said I was going to run out Sunday morning to get some new shoes so I could be all dolled up for my ‘surprise party’.  Later that night I asked what was for dinner and Keith said we were having Tomato soup  and grilled cheese – a little lackluster but still….yummy.  My phone rang and I didn’t recognize the number at first so, I ignored it then the same number called again and I thought it looked a little familiar but still didn’t answer.  I checked the number and it was Kristy’s – now since Keith had told me I was not allowed to talk to anyone because I’m one of those naturally nosey people who try to worm details (say about an upcoming party) out of folks – so I told Keith he might want to call her back.

Keith called Kristy and I ended up on the phone – it seems she’d bought a load of books (she owns Minerva Books – a great new & used bookstore here in the ‘burg) and couldn’t get anyone to help her unload them.  Her partner Beth was at reserves for the weekend and no one else was available to help.  Since I like her I had no problem helping….she offered to take us to dinner for our trouble but, I wouldn’t hear of it, after all, what are friends for, right?

I had already settled into my flannel lounge pants, grubby t-shirt, and house slippers for the evening so, I just threw on some dirty pants and slipped on my shoes – after all, I was just going to be hauling boxes of books, right?  During the short drive to Minerva’s Keith was chattering away and in retrospect, I think he was doing it to take my mind off of my birthday.  We pulled into the lot and after getting out I thought,”Wow, that BMW looks like Terri and Kartik’s car and wait a minute, that’s a Mazda 5 like Shannon and April have.”  Kristy met us outside and as we were walking to the door, I could see the balloon bouquets – too late I realized what was going on and I had no choice but to go on in.  Me….who won’t go to the mailbox without fixing my hair was being delivered to my surprise party without having bathed, without deodorant or cologne; with my hair a mess; and wearing a dirty shirt, pants, slip on shoes and a wind jacket.  OH the inhumanity of it all – for documented proof —–> Click Here

All in all I had a wonderful time and was actually surprised.  It was so nice of my friends and my family (well my Aunt Joey and Uncle Leon) to celebrate a milestone birthday with me!  I felt bad that my mom had made it about a block away but, got confused since she doesn’t really drive at night or in Petersburg and went home.  I sort of fault my father for not coming with her but, what the hell I had a good time even if my parents, sisters, nieces, nephews, son, daughter-in-law, and granddaughter didn’t show – nope…not the least bit bitter.  Yeah Right! LOL.  

Hey, it’s all good – I got my Wii and I got to spend time celebrating with many of my best friends and family!  I especially liked the ‘Birthday Princess’ crown LOL!!

I’m realizing (and have for some time actually) that this is more than just a line from an 80′s Culture Club song (God I miss the 80′s music, it just ‘seemed’ better to me back then).  It seems as I get older that there isn’t enough time for everything that I want/need to do.  I would like to think I’m pretty good at time management but after factoring in work, household duties, yard-work, etc. there just doesn’t seem to be that much time for a lot of other things.  There are books I want to read; friends and family to call/catch up with; visits to the gym; yard projects to start; interior renovations to begin/complete; and TONS of other things I would like to do but never seem to have the time for.

I think part of the problem is that I get ‘stingy’ with my ‘personal’ time.  Waking up at 4:30 in the morning to go to the gym then coming home and getting ready for work – working all day M-F and then getting home about 5 PM, I feel like 12 of my 24 hours are gone just like that *snap*.  Next, factor in 1-2 hours to unwind from work, eat, play with the dogs, pick up around the house plus 8 hours for sleep each night and I’m left with only about 2 hours per day….TWO HOURS?!?!  I refuse to be one of those people who live my life by a day-runner type pocket planner but MY GOD how else do working adults find the time to DO things they WANT to do after doing everything they HAVE to do?

Part of the ‘problem’ seems to be that – and my mother always told me this would happen – as I get older, time goes by faster and faster.  I swear, it seemed like it took FOREVER before I was able to drive (16); then FOREVER before I would graduate high school (18); FOREVER until I was legally able to drink (21) and now…I just can’t slow time down.  I totally understand what she meant now….of course then, I didn’t get it – kids never appreciate what their parents tell them until they get to ‘that’ age.  She also used to tell me that ‘Youth was wasted on the young because they don’t appreciate it.’  Again, I TOTALLY get that now mom!

LOL I remember my best friend, Ben, and I talking about how we would either kill ourselves or get married (to women) when we reached 40 – because older gays are pretty much ostracized in the gay community.  Now that I’m almost 40 (well about a week away) I cannot imagine doing EITHER of those things.  I, for the most part, really like my life and wouldn’t change a thing (except for moving from Woodland Heights – Richmond to Walnut Hill – Petersburg).  I do, quite frankly, worry that I won’t have enough time to accomplish everything that I want to do/see in my life before its over.  I have no doubt that the next 40 (or however many there will be) years will go significantly faster than the previous 40.  I guess the moral is that you have to make EVERY day, EVERY moment count.  UGGGG what is this I’m having some sort of mid-life realization/crisis thing???  Will it make me a better person?  Will I finally MAKE time for everything that I want to do.

I realize that after I retire (thank God I work for the State and have a nice deferred compensation plan, pension, and other benefits – I won’t be one of those retirees eating cat food LOL) I’ll have a lot more ‘free’ time for travel, gardening, reading, yada yada but, I want to make sure I can do some of that stuff – hiking up to Machu Picchu – while I’m virile enough to do it.  (Wow…like 40 makes me ancient and incapable of walking/hiking LOL….NOT).  Oddly though I know I’m aging, I still think and feel like a child most times – mom always said I suffered from PPS (Peter Pan Syndrome) – well I’m rambling now, guess I’ll go get more coffee, get Keith up, and be about the business of the day – God knows there is stuff to be done!